The Art of Ritual: Introduction and Chapter 1

The Art of Ritual is so much more than a “how to hold a ritual” book. It’s not Buckland’s Big Blue Sleeping Pill which is nothing to read but an excellent resource for fashioning and performing your rituals. No, this book explores ALL the aspects of ritual. That is what I would like to do with you in this series. I want to explore all the facets of ritual: what they are, why we have them, how we have them, what they mean to us at any given point of our lives.

The opening paragraph of the introduction tells us that human nature is to evolve and the knowledge that we are a part of something greater gives us the joy of living. The authors immediately acknowledge that our traditional rituals are frequently inadequate now to meet our spiritual needs for ritual and they offer this book as a way to understand those needs and to find solutions that will give us the rituals that are spiritually fulfilling.

They also address the concepts of power as it relates to ritual as well as to the rest of our lives. I find their definition of power interesting: “Power is the ability to cause or prevent change.” That’s an awesome thought. Having power means that you can make something happen—or make it NOT happen. This comes from Rollo Mays book, Power and Innocence, where he also defines five kinds of power. I want to share those with you.

First, there is exploitative. This is where the strong rule and the weak have no ability to stop them—and the strong have no concern for the weak. Second, there is manipulative. The strong are still ruling, but they do it with the cooperation of the weak. The weak have some measure of ability to control the outcome that they lacked within an exploitative relationship.

Third, there is competitive which is simply power against another. It implies a meeting of equals and a struggle of some sort to figure out who wins. Fourth, there is nutrient power. This is power that is used for the other to meet the needs of the other. Parenting is a prime example of nutrient power. Babies have no resources and no ability to care for themselves—but boy, do they have needs!

The fifth and final type of power is integrative, where power is used with another to build a better life for both. This is also called synergy. Power is made available to the community and everyone’s power is shared. This is what I strive for in the Circle’s rituals, particularly when we are talking about energy (energy is power) workings.

Ritual is what brings each of us power—power over the changes in our lives, power to deal with the choices we must make, and power to increase the sense of connectivity. We use ritual to mark every aspect of life, to transform the mundane to the extraordinary and thus give a sense of worth to our lives. Giving worth is the root concept in the word “worship”. We worship that which is sacred and what better place to start than with ourselves and our lives?

The authors also wrote directions for using the book—and made the rather pointed suggestion that this book is for everyone—regardless of your experience with rituals. They specifically write that rituals are how we cope with transition, that the ritual is a way of re-establishing the feeling of connection and wholeness. They have included self-exploration questions with each chapter that I will either incorporate into this text or list at the end of each section, as well as make it available as a separate worksheet.

I plan on doing a lot of this in text form, but will certainly create and post PowerPoint presentations where the imagery is a better way of communicating the concepts than mere words alone. I welcome your feedback, questions and suggestions throughout this study; email is the surest, fastest way to get to me. As we progress through this, if the need for virtual or real meetings arises, those can be set up according to the participants’ schedules and ability to attend. Do not hesitate to ask for those meetings!

And onwards to Chapter 1: Understanding the role of ritual in your life

The first thing to realize is that EVERYTHING is ritual. ANY rite, ceremony or series of symbolic acts focused towards fulfilling a particular intention are ritual. It is not just about spiritual or religious things; rituals are an innate part of Nature. All creatures have rituals of behavior. Courtship, hunting, defining territory, and defense…all ritualistic behavior—even among humans. What do you think your morning routine is but ritual? Get up, use the toilet, brush your teeth, get ready to face the day—and don’t forget the coffee!

Within the context of this book and our discussion, we are not talking about these unconscious rituals, these stylized (habitual) ways of doing the mundane tasks of everyday life. Instead, we will look at the ceremonies that we expressly and consciously create to mark particular events. This includes the typical life milestones of birth, graduation, marriage, and so on, as well as marking the passing of the seasons. Pagans are not the only people who have specific celebrations at specific times of the year!

So what is the purpose of ritual? Why bother? Because rituals help us cope with change. They provide a way to acknowledge the transitions and give us a foothold, to prepare for the next leap out onto the next thing. The tradition of a ritual, a particular ceremony that has been handed down reminds us of our roots—and that we have them. The symbols within a ritual can speak deeply to our psyches and offer illumination and understanding of the event in a moving, momentous spiritual way.

A ritual can be defined as an enactment of a myth. Like a child who pretends to be a doctor, a fireman or a teacher, we learn how to be what we can be through these enactments. When we invoke the Divine’s presence and name it with a particular name, we are claiming the attributes of that aspect for ourselves. We can also learn to recognize the sacred within the context of a ritual, even to the point of carrying that recognition to the sacred that dwells in each of us.

The whole purpose of a ritual is to increase that sense of balance and connection in the celebrants, to reinforce the links between us, the world and the larger rhythms and energies (God, if you want to name it so) that bring stability and light to our lives. This purpose can be the main reason so many Pagans find most Christian-based rituals lacking in a spiritual connection. Even though they may be long-standing family traditions, the symbols and essence of these rituals no longer addresses the Pagan’s spirituality. They no longer make the link.

Quoted directly from the book: “When the rituals are so finely woven into the fabric of our common expressions that we barely recognize them for what they are, much less tap into their inherent power, it is time to take a look at how we can once again actively bring ritual to a meaningful and relevant position.” What does this mean? If you go to your parents year after year for Christmas celebration when you are a Pagan and do not celebrate the Christ child’s birth, this ritual may not resonate with any personal truths for you. You may physically be there, but your mind—and your spirit—are off somewhere else, making a shopping list or wondering if Uncle Gus will ever stop combing over his bald spot. You may be willing to participate to be a part of the family, but then you have your own Yule ritual that meets your spiritual needs.

There’s nothing wrong with this. All we’re saying is, be aware of what purpose the ritual serves for you—and don’t lie, you have to face yourself in the mirror. It’s a perfectly acceptable reason to say that you observe any ritual because it serves some purpose other than connecting YOU to the Universal sacredness. Once you can define the purpose of any ritual, you can decide if you should supplement it with a more personal ceremony as well. For lack of a better word, you can have a ritual that resonates with YOUR truths and have it in addition to the traditional family Thanksgiving dinner…or whatever celebration whose purpose no longer suits your own needs. You don’t have to choose one over the other. Especially if you will estrange your non-Pagan family and friends.

Maybe you haven’t come out of the broom closet. Maybe you love your Jewish mother, or devoutly Methodist best friend. You can still participate in the traditional customs, still decorate a Christmas tree, still eat matzo ball soup. But you don’t have to settle for doing only that if these things do not meet your spiritual needs.

So how do we identify those needs? This requires an honest and in-depth appraisal of our own identity. We need to know who we are, what we are, what makes us tick to know how to create a ritual that will satisfy our longing for connection to the sacred. You will note that I do not even try to define that “sacred”. Whatever the central point of your life is, whatever the focus of your life’s dancing, where you spend your time and money—that is your “sacred”, your god.

So what defines the sacred for you? Don’t tell me, write it down for yourself. And please be honest, this is for posterity. If you are asked what you believe in, what are your truths, do you have an answer? Do you know? Stop here if you like and go think about that for a while. I’ll still be here when you get back.

Ok, that wasn’t so hard. Having defined our identity and knowing who we are, we can now create rituals that fill our needs. We create those rituals based on our personal and cultural myths. So what is a myth? Not an unmarried woman with a lisp. Merriam-Webster defines myth as: “a usually traditional story of ostensibly historical events that serves to unfold part of the world view of a people or explain a practice, belief, or natural phenomenon”. It’s a parable or an allegory, a way of dealing with the larger-than-life concepts. Joseph Campbell (Myths to Live By) suggests that myths fill four main functions.

They are mystical or metaphysical: the purpose of this type of myth is to bring a person to a state of wonder at the mystery of it all—and to bring that from a Universal concept to a personal one. Myths are cosmological: functioning to bring this mystery to the people of a culture in such a way as to help them understand their world. They are sociological: verifying, nurturing and preserving the beliefs and customs of a culture. Lastly, they are also psychological: they act as a guide and support to us as we live, from birth to death and all the milestones in between.

So we use the myths of our culture and our own personal experiences to create our rituals. We find the symbols that best represent the Universal concepts and speak to us not only on a conscious level, but also an emotional one, that open us to change. The ritual itself is a boat we build, a craft for traversing the river of Time. But in order to derive the power of a ritual, it must be special; it must stand out against the common fabric of our daily existence.

By being remarkable, ritual broadens our view. Our daily lives, with their myriad issues and meaningless but endless details, can pull our focus down onto the negative, painful things we all deal with. We can become preoccupied by what looks like a life of pain and sorrow. It’s like standing in front of a mural and only looking at one tiny square foot of the 50 foot long vista. We literally lose sight of the larger picture of our lives. Ritual provides a way to step back, to put that little square of unhappiness into perspective.

The saying is, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” I tell you, it’s ALL small stuff. Really. Any time you think it’s that important, consider honestly if anyone will remember or recall it 25 years from now. Ten years. Five. One. Tomorrow. As I am known to say, any day you wake up breathing is a good day.

Hugh Prather tells us in his book, The Little Book of Letting Go, to “make your state of mind more important than what you are doing”. Let me say that again, it’s that important a concept. Make your state of mind more important than what you are doing. How many of us can do that? I can’t. I try. But I can’t all the time. I’m human…same as you. But if you try and keep trying, then you can reach the state of “mindfulness of being”. This is when you are your most authentic “YOU”, when you are fully self-aware and conscious of being the one in charge of your life—the one who makes the choices. (And remember, to decline to make a choice is still making a choice. And if you don’t like your life, CHANGE YOUR CHOICES!)

Ritual gives us a way to take responsibility for our lives through an ongoing process of change, accepting that change and preparing for the next (inevitable) change. Each milestone gives us the opportunity to step back and look at the mural of our lives, even as we create it, brushstroke by brushstroke. The ritual has enough going on that while we participate in it, we can disassociate from any negative feelings, fears or sense of isolation we might have about the milestone being celebrated.

While we are using ritual to move towards the future, we also have elements of our past in the ritual as well—and not only our own immediate past but the collective unconscious as well. We tap into the roots of our ancestral heritage, which are usually expressed within the mythological motifs that are Universal and transcend any particular culture or history. This offers us a fundamental sense of unity—Universal Unity, the ultimate sense of connection. If we are all One, then we are indeed most deeply and profoundly connected.

This sense of unity is at the heart of the power of our ritual. A well-designed—and well executed—ritual may seem like great drama, but it is much more. Ritual opens our minds to a state of timelessness, or what is generally described as an “altered state of consciousness”. It parallels any other trance state, whether through meditation or drugs. It is of course legal, which is a big benefit for most of us. Like being able to see the whole house only by going outside and stepping away from it, it allows us to see our whole selves by stepping outside of our normal consciousness. And like noticing that the roof needs repair or that bushes have overgrown and require pruning, this stepping outside of our mental home lets us notice the things we need to change within ourselves—and helps us find the energy to do it.

Part of ritual’s function is to direct energy and I would share with you a quote from Starhawk and her book, Dreaming the Dark: “Directed energy causes change. To have integrity, we must recognize that our choices bring about consequences, and that we cannot escape responsibility for the consequences, not because they are imposed by some external authority, but because they are inherent in the choices themselves.” Read that again. What does this mean to you? Go write it down, if you like. I’ll wait again. This is important stuff!

What is “directed energy”? Ummm, how about ANYTHING YOU DO? If you’re burning calories, you’re directing energy somewheres. (And if you’re not burning calories, you’re dead. Why are you reading this instead of going about your ghostly business?) So how do we use ritual to direct energy? By using the power present in ritual to assist us through change. This gives us the authority (read: power) to deal with that change, to deal with the feelings caused by the change, to prepare for what the change will bring—and this happens not just in ritual, but as early as the planning stages of the ritual. Just preparing to have ritual, to begin writing down the ceremony, to decide what symbols to use and who sits where…this starts the energy flowing.

We’re fighting the law here—Newton’s first law of physics—which is fully applicable to the psychological as well, and states that an object persists in its state of rest or uniform motion unless it is compelled to change. We are often compelled to change and in feeling compelled, we feel powerless to stop it and we have no power over it. Having a ritual changes that process from “being done to” to “doing” and we claim back the power. And claiming back that power returns us to our own spiritual center and our sense of self-esteem.

Edward Whitmont (Return of the Goddess): “Any affect or emotion which in its raw and unaltered form is too intense to be controlled by will alone may need its ritual. Without ritual, such energies may inundate the ego and force it into acting out or into obsessive behavior. Ritual brings about containment and acceptance, control of intensity, and ‘dosage’.” Having ritual lets us deal with things that are “TOO”—too painful, too much, too large, in greater abundance than we can handle on our own. It is a tool for dealing with that which would overwhelm us and lead us to despair. In other words, it keeps us off the streets and out of the bars.

Unfortunately, our Western civilization has led many of us to such a feeling of isolation that we have no way of dealing with our transitions. Solon Kimbala suggests that one of the main reasons for the increasing mental health issues in our society are based largely on the fact that we are so separated from family and traditions that we are generally forced to mark our milestones alone. He also suggests that although we do this with our private symbols which may be deeply meaningful to us, they do not help us find or recognize the greater connections to other people.

Ritual gives us a way to connect; it helps us find the balance we seek, and to honor the sacred connection we hold with each other and beyond, out into the Universe. It is our human nature to grow, evolve and change; ritual offers a way to do so. If you are not currently involved in a traditional religion, you are still looking for a way to give worth to what you do hold sacred. As Pagans, we frequently come from traditional backgrounds and we are seeking to find the fulfillment of sacred connection that was promised in that traditional method of worship—but didn’t resonate for us. And even if you still participate in a traditional religion, this book and this study can offer you a chance to increase your conscious awareness of the rituals you use.

As mentioned before, there are self-exploration exercises at the end of each chapter, and we have reached that point now. I don’t ask to see these; it is a personal thing for you, a tool to help you identify ritual and how you use it, participate in it, are affected by rituals. Remember, you are more than welcome to contact me for further discussion of this topic.

The authors have given a week as the time period between chapters. For you, this may or may not be sufficient; the main goal is to do it with discipline and to really think about what’s being explored here. You will only benefit by as much effort as you put into it.

Chapter 1: Understanding the role of ritual in your life -- Self Exploration

1. Purpose. Identify a transition you are undergoing. It can be connected with career, relationship, or another aspect of your life.

Note how this change affects the balance in your life: what is becoming more important and less important?

To incorporate this change into your life in a positive way:

What do you need to do or have?

What feelings do you need to address?

What new information do you need?

How do you need to be different?

2. Relevance. How do you want this transition to impact who and how you are in your life now and in the future? How is this change relevant to the “big picture” of who you are?

How do you connect with the “big picture”? Think of times you felt connected with the universe, at peace, or filled with love and wonder—if only for a moment. Music, personal connection, nature, or beauty sometimes gives rise to these feelings. Write about these experiences. Include your feelings, thoughts, sensations, and energy. How did these experiences affect your life, your perceptions, or beliefs?

3. Power. Connecting with the universal aspect of Self remind you that at your center you are constant and balanced; when you undergo transition, your outer self, and your idea of yourself, changes. It is especially important during change to be able to access balance. We all have different things we do that help us feel centered; exercise, meditation, breathing, and being in nature are a few. Make a list of all the things you can think of that help bring you back to yourself.

Commit to using one of more of these tools every day, and record your experiences in your journal. Make a note of which tool you are going to use.

4. Need. How can this transition help you increase relationship? With yourself? Friends? Family? Coworkers? Community? School? Political action? Spirit? Service? Choose one way you want this change to increase your relatedness.

At the end of the week, read over your journal entries. Write down what you learned and anything new you noticed from reading through your experiences this week.